Dear Precious Child,
Every person in the world is emotionally dependent upon other humans, their mate, their parents, their friends, their pastor, their priest, their children, their club members, their political foes, their work buddies, their neighbors, their siblings and their sports figures. In other words, My children assign to other human beings the ability to make them happy, accepted and valued. In healthy relationships, it's called a sense of community, the exchange of words and attitudes of well being, love, kindness and goodness. It's necessary for healthy self worth for everyone.
As a loving parent I coach My children on how to effectively show acceptance to others by speaking words of affirmation to people so that they might leave your presence with a feeling of having been valued and affirmed by another person. It's called sharing My love with others. The healthy exchange of words, attitudes and acts with other people is part of what is called the body of Christ, every part supplying what is needed by other parts. (Romans 12:3-5)
However, there are also unhealthy relationships, ones where the people are so extremely emotionally dependent upon one another that one person might make an idol of the other person or each person makes an idol of the other person. That is called codependency and it is built upon the erroneous belief that your happiness is dependent upon the other person's words or actions, that your self worth is dependent upon his or her affirmation of you and vice versa.
Codependency is emotionally making another person the lord of your life or you making the other person's happiness dependent upon you as lord of his or her life. It is idolatry. Often a codependent person forces another person to be dependent upon himself or herself in order to be the lord of that person's life. Codependency is a demonically instituted mind-set in which only you are the person who can solve problems and guide another person into happiness. It has taken My commission of bearing the burdens of another person to the extreme, which is what the devil does, takes everything to the extreme which will overburden and curse both persons equally.
Helping another person in his or her efforts to live a happy life only becomes dangerous when one person becomes dependent upon the other one or both of the people in a relationship become dependent upon each other for their own success and happiness. Somewhere in the relationship a demon of codependency has taken over in the relationship. In codependency, there is no faith in Me that I can independently make both people happy and successful, so either both or one of the people takes over the job and it become laborious because My children were never meant to be lords in the lives of others.
Becoming the lord in the life of another person is a tough job, one that involves being a savior, a rescuer, a guide, an encourager, a counselor and an advocate; in other words being Me, the Father of all humanity. When a human being takes over that job, then a codependency demon enters into the relationship and the two people destroy each other. Did you hear what I said? I said that the two people destroy one another in a codependent relationship. There is no other possible outcome as long as they are emotionally or physically dependent upon one another, or one is dependent upon the other, or one person wants to be lord in the life of another person.
No person can be the lord of the life of another person without it becoming slavery. The requirement of one person yielding to the prideful will of another person is demonic. Nobody wins, neither the oppressor nor the oppressed.
There is one relationship in which there is a healthy codependency and that is between My children and Me. Jesus, Himself, said that He was totally dependent upon Me when He said that He didn't do anything unless He saw Me do it and He didn't say anything unless He heard Me say it. (John 5:30) The relationship between Jesus and Me is pure and virtuous, as is My relationship with you. Because I gave you free will, there is no demand upon your loyalty. There is mutual respect between us, not one of us dominating the other one.
For My good news to be spread in the earth, I am dependent upon My children to become My images in the world, doing the ministry of bearing the fruit of My character in the earth so that others may see their good works and glorify Me. (Matthew 5:14-16) My true children are dependent upon Me for My guidance, My counsel, My insight, My wisdom, My tutoring, My revelations and My keys to My kingdom which give them a wonderful, happy, glorious life on earth.
A dependent relationship on Me is necessary for My children to overcome the evil works of the devil in the world so that they will be alerted with My gift of discerning of spirits when evil is trying to trap them into doing the will of the devil. Because I am Spirit, I know the temptations before you do and I alert My children who are dependent upon Me and My Holy Spirit for My protection. That dependency on Me pays off for you in that you can effectively resist the devil and send him to hell instead of yielding to him and experiencing destruction in your life in some form. Your dependency upon Me as your spiritual GPS and radar is healthy and necessary so that you will avoid the evil traps set for you in the world.
You must become codependent upon Me but refuse to be codependent with other people in the world. Your dependency upon Me frees you from the works of the devil. My dependency upon you to spread My love and light in the world will cause other people to want to know Me, fulfilling My mission of winning everyone with My love. Being codependent with some other human being will bind you to the works of the devil in the life of that person and you will be cursed by the same demons.
Depend upon Me and live the abundant life that I promised.
Your Protective Father